"Sometimes I let matches burn down to my fingertips just to feel something, anything."

Noir is basically a 3/3 3-health ally on a delay. In my opinion, you go through the encounter deck too slowly for there to be any value in hiding specific treacheries under him. If you can afford to wait a few turns though, Noir is legitimately one of the best thwarting options in Protection, and a good ally all-around. There are quite a lot of treacheries in every game (all the Standard + Expert cards), many have surge, and scenarios often find ways to deal you extra encounter cards, so it has usually only taken me 2 or 3 villain phases to get up to 3/3. Don't forget that Protection also has the ally-engine Med Team, which is insane value with a fully-statted Noir. As good as Noir is, it can still be tough to compete for ally slots in Champions in 2022, so I would say include Noir if you are in the Web of Life and Destiny archetype and at least give him consideration with any Web-Warrior hero.